A Very Grey Matter

Your Brain is a complex living organism, my friend. The sooner you realize this, the better. It may lie, quietly in your head, trying to take you mind away from it, but believe me, it is thinking! It is plotting, making plans for itself, without you knowing!
It is a seasoned spy, your Brain. Don’t fool yourself into believing that you can read this article without it knowing. It traces all your steps, letter by letter! As you raed tish setnece, it is arleady triyng to con-fuse you! (It shall not play the trick again, don’t worry. The trick stops the moment you find out.)

Now pay ATTENTION! Try reading this with your eyes closed. Let not the Brain find out what is now to be revealed. Try not reading this aloud either, may it hear what I am about to tell you…
Ready?
Good!

YOUR BRAIN, my friend, IS A CONFIDENCE TRICKSTER! Think of the people who jump of buildings, bridges, cliffs and ships! The ruddy swindler tricks them! It convinces limbed animals that flight is their second nature! It shall mumble secretively in your ears, ‘the swine flu, so can you’.
 Others are duped into believing that the Davy Jones’ Locker is second in command when paddling from Mumbai to Madagascar!

Your Brain is also the cause of a billion troubles and troubled bullions! Let me reinforce my idea with an example. Ever heard of Mr. Henpecked Husband? The docile urbane fellow? Well in case you haven’t, let me introduce him. He is the fella, who ran for his life when a fat foul banty (of the domestic variety) threatened to dismember him. Could you blame him for chickening out?
You must be wondering, why we speak of him in the middle of this revelatory parlance. Well, we do so to reveal the Brain’s nefarious hand behind this altercatory episode. The roots of the squabble between Mr. Henpecked and the Domestic Foul lie in Mr. Henpecked’s cranium. He carried with him, his nemesis, a Pea Brain; and the hen loved peas. Pecking it out of his cranium would have resolved all issues, but the Brain convinced Mr. Henpecked otherwise, and the troubles began!
I spoke of troubled bullions earlier. ‘What relations does a Brain have with money?’ you would ask me. Let me tell you, the quandary monetary perplexities ending in beggared dispositions are all the Brain’s handiwork! Mr. Henpecked’s example comes in handy here as well.
 While avoiding the pecking and running about, Herr Henpecked’s attitude did not go down too well with his spouse. She sewed him up, dragged him to court and then sued him. The poor chap lost all his gold bullions in alimony and so it goes.

Some individuals inquire about the Virgins

It is in the nature of the Brain to dupe, but even the most dishonourable cheats, will shy away from the Brain! It is a mental! Last I heard it was seen convincing a bunch of guys that going armed, into the biggest hotel in one of the biggest cities in the world in a small boat, high on Lysergic acid diethylamide was the best way to spend a peaceful afternoon. Furthermore, to top it all, it also convinced the bunch that any casualty of this highly entertaining episode was to anyway be greeted by 72 Virgins. ‘What more can one ask?’ the bunch of loons said and departed. (I also hear that the loony goons went ahead with the plan and one of them was caught alive. The virgins never came for him. He was underage; that might have been the reason. The virgin did not want any legal trouble now, did they?)

Many have been fallen for these cheep tricks my friends. Why do you think the mummies kept their brain out of their bodies! Do not let the brain ruin you. Constant Vigilance is the call! Listen to the appeal of the brainless!! Beware! Beware!!